(not my first attempt at) Being an adult

Okay, so I've read and seen in a lot of places that you should celebrate your small wins every now and then because motivation and woohoo and such, pardon my bad writing skills (I'm having a lot of brain farts today). These last few weeks I've been trying to emulate what normal people would call a 'responsible adult human being' and it's trickier than it looks.

I've been trying to do everything and be super cool and chill about it instead of whining like an asshole about how I don't want to do my chores, go to the bank etc etc. I go to the gym every week, been catching up on my studies and actually doing homework and going to classes (which is a huge leap in and of itself) and attempting to be social with friends and new people alike.

But today and yesterday nights events are the biggest wins of all. Yesterday night, I saw a cockroach and screamed for my mother and it disappeared. Then I emerged at midnight later that night, and if you knew me, I hate being anywhere alone at midnight because I'm weird and paranoid like that, I saw the cockroach on the wall and picked up the closest magazine and SMACKED it so hard. It's guts flew everywhere and then I got myself a glass of water and then left the dead body there to rot and prove to the mothership that I am so brave and courageous.

Then today, I asked my tutor a question in class. And he answered it. And we had a real adult conversation about the general linear model and significance and other statistics and stuff.

And then I got home, bailed on going out to dinner tonight to stay home and spend time with the mothership. Then I went to shower, finished showering and found a huge as giant spider on the ceiling. It was like THIS big. I shat my pants, gathered some old scrap paper and smacked that little fucker down. Then I drowned him and felt so accomplished.

Story of my life, guys.

When pissed, make a blog post about it

I dunno if this happens to the rest of you students out there who use a printer in their daily life for printing useless shit for school or uni, but this happens to me so frequently whenever I use my god damn printer. Excuse my language.

My printer loves to fuck up right when it's needed most. Last semester when my final assignment was due and I was celebrating the completion of the last assignment of the semester, my printer decides to fuck up.

Real bad.

Luckily for me, I finished the assignment several days before it was due but unfortunately it's never enough for this scumbag piece of technology that I call my printer. I printed the document, half way through it spits out the printed pages and then eats it back up again, consuming half of the document back into its abyss of rotating wheels and ink. The printer is jammed and it tells me to remove the paper jam and press OK. But it's stuck. And I can't get it out and after a good few hours I give up and call my friend to ask if I can hijack her printer.

Thankfully, Canon printers are more reliable than HP ones. Fuck you, HP.

By the time I get back from telling the mythical story of the jammed printer, my mums managed to get the printer working and fix the paper jam. This is what mothers are for, and I am grateful.

And today is the second week of the second semester of 2013, I need to print my tutorial notes for tomorrows class and guess what? The printer fucks up. Stupid thing. I'm ready to trade it in for a Canon now.

I fretted about not having enough paper, but sure enough, there was three reams of A4 paper left in the office. The printer does its thing, and then eats my tutorial notes. You've no idea how pissed I got but I did manage to fix it and then printed it away happily, watching the printer with eagle eyes and then it tells me that I've run out of ink.

Fucking damn it all.

Printer 2
Leanne 0

GAME OVER

back from the gold coast!

hullo! Just got back from the gold coast the other day from our short midweek holiday after finals finished. I don't know whats wrong with me but everytime I get back from a trip or holiday I get miserably sick. Last time it was really bad food poisoning and this time.. it's mild food poisoning? I'm not even sure and these stomach cramps are killing me since I had to work today :(

I'll be posting up photos soon but in the meantime, I have much to do in the home space. (eg. rolling around in bed with a hot water bottle and doing things that do not involve cleaning my room)

post exam post!

Well, hi!

I have finally finished all my final exams and am thrilled for it to be all over, but I am exhausted. So glad to finally be going on this midweek holiday trip to the gold coast that we planned a while back. Super grateful for finally being able to take a break but still jealous of those other cool kids who get to go to Vegas and Thailand with their partners, BUT THIS WILL BE SO MUCH FUN.

But for now, I'm going to sleep because tomorrow I have to get up at 6am and pack a few more things before we leave and cuddle my dog. He has a very short attention span. I'll post about him another time but I'm gonna fall asleep now.

Hey ya'll

Exams start soon and I haven't slept properly in a week or two, I'm exhausted and I hate everyone.
I can't wait to go on this holiday, I really need this - I feel like I'm dying.
This is my blog, I can whine all I want, bye nao.

Dear Grandmother,

I'm being eaten alive by research, word counts, a wholesome amount of deadlines and family pressures. The workload at uni right now isn't as bad as it was before, but I'm super stressed lately because I've been working more and people like you make my heart hurt.

I know that's not a very nice thing to say.

But since my parents have separated, I have reason to believe that you are spreading terrible rumours about my mother. You're horribly judgmental about everyone, my mother, le boyfriend for example.

You're totally obsessed with one of my friend's mothers, who seems to meddle in our family business quite a lot just by circumstance, which only fuels your gossip even more and it's a horrible situation for me to be in because I have to live with all this gossip and people asking me questions about 'what really happened' between my parents.

It's pretty simple, dad was unfaithful, mother and father didn't get along, and I think you remain an eternal  gossip machine for eternity. Rumours like my mother having a boyfriend, dad never cheating, it was just harmless flirting, mother was psycho crazy and bitched about everyone. I don't see why two sides of the family couldn't just simply treat each other a little better and sort things out.

I do wish dad hadn't cheated, and you were a little more concerned about everyone's welfare instead of just focusing on your son and your side of the family and treating my mother like shit. I wish my mother hadn't gossiped so much either, for your sake. But we're only human, everyone's reputation is ruined anyway.

But even still. I had expected that after the separation was over and dad moving out would be a good thing. That both sides would leave each other alone and stop creating a crazy whirlwind of a horrid adventure for all of us. But no, rumours keep coming.

According to what I've heard you say, sexism is awesome. Men should be breadwinners, women should remain in the kitchen, pop out babies and raise them. You love your own bloodline so much you fail to recognise anyone outside of the family. I think you need to be more open minded. You lean towards misogyny, that you are worthless if you lose your virginity before marriage, that girls shouldn't date measly boys who are tattooed. I wonder what you would do to me if you found out that I am everything you would never want in a granddaughter. You judge people on their social standing and their education. Someone who dropped out of high school is a bad person, and those who have phDs are better than everyone else. Be a doctor. Why don't you study accounting? There's good money in it.

It's a lot of pressure for me, and sometimes you;re just plain mean. Several years ago, you gave me an expensive dress as a gift, now you ask me to return it to you because I've gained weight since then and want to give it to someone else because they would make better use of it. It's so horribly rude, I was speechless. I told you I might still fit in it, I'll try it on when I have the time. But you had to insist that I don't have any use of it anymore.

Why are you claiming your granddaughter's clothing? It's rather rude and cold hearted of you.

You were such a warm, forgiving and loving person when I was young and ignorant.

I apologise that this is such a sad and rude post. But this is what I see and think of you. Correct me if I'm wrong, please, I wish you would.

yo ho yo ho it's off to work we go

NAHT.

I have a cold. And it's really bad. And I hate myself. I need money, but I've taken the day off work tomorrow which should give me extra time to work on my assignment. But obviously that's not gonna work out if I keep hacking up phlegm and blowing my nose as loudly as an air horn would sound right next to your ear.

I've been drinking about five pots of tea per day, new personal best if I do say so myself. Even though I'm terribly sucky at researching and writing my assignment I did manage to drag my ass outside today though. Clad in gross sweatpants and an old shirt, I did some grocery shopping and stocked up on nutella, honey-centred throat lozenges, some lasagne and ice cream and managed to go and rent more movies despite the fact that I have deadlines right up my ass.

Yesterday le boyfriend came over, and brought me cake and made me lukewarm tea. And then we rolled around in bed and watched movies and played repetitive games on the iPad. What a nice guy, but I managed to make him sick. You go, Leanne. It's like that Pandemic game all over again, only except my disease is actually catching on.

Anyhow, I'm gonna go drink some more tea and roll around in bed and play games like see-how-high-you-can-get-your-fever and tomorrow morning I plan on crying myself to death over the fact that I've missed work and losing out on money. sadface.